I'm officially hooked on Dark Souls, though. Aaaaahhhh, what kind of awful dictator has this game turned me into? You'll note here that I'm Vin Diesel-ing for effect. I'm going to rule a world with no one left alive unless I find them useful. Smart money is on this guy due to sheer determination. It ain't gonna be meek-ass Maughlin, lazy-ass Lenigrast, or the talking cat. And yes, I am the next monarch, because there will be very few alternatives by the time this shit's over. The Emerald Herald isn't worried about my strategy she's just there to be impressed by all these hot souls I'm packing. It's not how you collect souls, it's that you collect souls. I eradicate one enemy and move on to the next. I started grinding, enemies stopped respawning, and once I realized there was the possibility of perma-death, suddenly my goal became to wipe everyone out. Not in a cool, rampage-y way, in a sad, grind-y way because I refuse to face more than one opponent at once. I'm on a path to murder every enemy in SotFS to extinction and enjoy some peace and quiet. Right? I need to watch things die (from a good, safe distance). Until then, I'm pretty sure spamming arrows from afar is the definition of honor. Someday I'll get that 10th Intelligence point, though, and then it's on for 30 potential moments of greatness. Learning that I couldn't even use the cheap strategy I was going for was a wonderfully pathetic moment. I even went so far as to actively seek out the Soul Arrow that Brad refused to use in Demon's Souls because it was too effective, only to discover after buying it that as a Bandit, I was woefully short on stats for it. I'll gladly chop ankles while they swing over my head and run away like a wee girl if things go south. I kite the shit out of everyone to the best possible spot. I find myself trying to hide beside doorways to ambush enemies, fight them on stairwells, and generally do anything I can do to avoid a straight-up fight. When I'm in the mood to play multiplayer with assholes I'll play Call of Duty. Yes, it's worth the health hit to me to play permanently hollow (Edit: nevermind, it doesn't work like that, thanks because the first time some yahoo kills me when I've got a significant amount of souls to recover, or if there's some kind of griefing item like the Demon's Souls scraping spear that exclusively dickheads use just to be dickheads, I won't handle that well. I know the general school of thought is that invasions are "part of the game", but I'll pass on that. Sadly, I'm not sure a functional Ram Charger still exists. Actually, I could go get some Pearl beer. I'm basically Lone Wolf McQuade minus the sweet-ass Ram Charger, Pearl beer, and combat ability. I miss the messages, bloodstains, and seeing randoms run around, but I just have zero interest in PvP, invasions, or even summoning. Top o' the mornin' to ya!Īctually, I'm not playing with others at all. That was the first time I'd been Dark Souled, but certainly not the last. At that time, I could have used that amount to level up about three times. My spirit officially broke when I tried to backstab this turtle-y thing, and it instead somehow saw it coming and basically gave me the people's elbow to immediately crush and kill me at a cost of about 4200 souls. I wish I could un-see some of the failure, honestly, but the lost souls will eat away at my lost soul. That content was fantastic, whereas no one should ever bear witness to me getting up to speed. I have a newfound appreciation for Vinny and Brad's playthroughs of Dark and Demon's Souls, respectively. Between my extremely slow learning curve, grinding every enemy into oblivion, and general ineptitude, let's just say I'm not Twitch streaming my Dark Souls run.
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